Monday, April 14, 2008

The Green's Functions Blues

The sun finally poked through the clouds on Sunday and we went for a long walk in nature. We saw colorful flowers and blooming trees, we saw ducks and other birds. We saw funny insects and even horses. And humans.

Yes, now and then we encountered another wandering couple and they said hallo and we said hallo back. Later, downtown, we saw many more people, but we didn't exchange any hallos with them.

It was cloudy and dark when we were back in the city. It started raining and we opened an umbrella. It felt even darker under the umbrella.

So here's our Brilliant Idea of the Week. Or of the Day, as we've been rather prolific lately. You know those birthday cards that start singing when you open them? How about umbrellas with spokes that light up when you open them! They would make a dark, rainy day so much more bearable. Patent No RTGML20080414a.


It's been a while since we last treated you to some of our household jokes! Let's see what we've got for you...

We watched “Paris, je t'aime” this weekend. It's a movie consisting of 18 short movies, mostly love stories, set in Paris. Quite predictably, Gérard Depardieu the Ubiquitous was co-directing and appearing in one of them.
RTG said: 'Somebody should make a movie called “Gérard, je t'aime”: eighteen short movies starring Gérard Depardieu.'

Here we were just BS-ing and improvising:
RTG: I've put all my money in stockings.
ML: You mean stocks.
RTG: No, stockings.
ML: Stocks are dropping.
RTG: I wish stockings were dropping.

We are allowed to outsource now and then, so this last one comes from poor Marina the Nut. Another attempt to bake a decent cake had failed or something, inducing her to lament her geeky self thus:
“All I can do properly in this life is calculate Green's functions. Green's functions is all I am good at. It does bring bread to the table... I don't even like bread.”

That's close to Woody Allen's “The food here is so bad... And such small portions!” or another Marina: “Gortz shoes are so ugly – and they're always way too big for me!”


Jillian said...

"How about umbrellas with spokes that light up when you open them! They would make a dark, rainy day so much more bearable. Patent No RTGML20080414a."

LOL... that's actually not a BAD idea. But it seems like something people will find a way to abuse, like adding sound or some other such nonsense!

I won't even comment on those jokes. :-P

Roufa Tav Gosou & Mimi Lass said...

Oh, c'mon, Jillian, give it a try...

But you are probably right about the umbrellas. Oh well! It can't get worse than cellphones.

Dear readers, we forgot to ask you: what would be a good name for such an invention?

Bimmy the Bookish said...

WE think patent no RTGML200804 14a should have ultra violet light rays so that not only id there light, but a light sun tan too!
And maybe it plays something like "Somewhere, over the rainbow" or some such??!
You two are on fire - so many ideas. What DO you eat for breakfast??

Roufa Tav Gosou & Mimi Lass said...

Bimmy, you are not doing bad yourself! FROGTASTIC idea! (Although we prefer to avoid damaging UVs.) One can also ask for a built-in pop-up shelf, big enough for a sandwich or something. The more your umbrella can hold for you the better - holding an umbrella leaves you without enough free hands, don't you think?

The next gadget would be prosthetic third arms.

Bimmy the Bookish said...

A shelf, you say?
I'd buy that umbrella. i'd buy two if they had extra arms to hold themselves.
ive always found holding umbrellas to be rather irritating :)